Not Waking Up

Ever have those days when you wish you wouldn’t wake up the next morning? Of course you have. That’s why you’re reading this.  

It’s one of those days.  Has been for a few days.  I don’t like being here, in this place in my mind. I guess that’s what makes you not want to wake up.  I’ve been doing pretty good. Yes, they are right. The times of feeling good, feeling well, do get longer. It’s been a couple of months since I’ve felt majorly depressed. I hope they’re right about it not lasting as long too.   

Don’t get me wrong. I still never feel great, never quite normal. I think I have been doing a better job of fighting off the dark depression, not letting it get a good grip on me. Well, now I have succumb.  

Had a lot of varying thoughts this past week. Suicide, checking in at the mental health hospital, calling my therapist for an “emergency” session. I have done none of those things. 

I’ll see what tomorrow brings. 

Good luck everyone. 


About Avictimnomore

Lost soul, trying to find myself. Trying to learn to be a survivor of child sexual abuse, the death of my parents when I was a teen, and being disowned by my remaining family.
This entry was posted in adult survivor of child abuse, awareness, child abuse, depression and anxiety, depression awareness, sexual abuse, suicide, suicide prevention, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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