Am I too old for hugs? Sometimes, many times I just want a hug. Not a put your arms around me for a second and give me a couple pats on the back or something. Although that would be nice too. I want someone to hold me. Give me a big long hug and tell me you love me.
As if that’s not bad enough, I want my mommy. My mom has been dead since 1980, I believe. I long to be held, cuddled, made to feel like everything is going to be alright. Even if it’s not “mommys’ always there for you”. I haven’t felt that since she died.
Is it too much to ask to feel like that again? Am I too old? Should I be more grown up? Be over that by now? Is it a result of my abuse, my abandonment? Or just because she died when I was young? Side note: I turned 52 this year.
Good questions for my therapist tomorrow.