Category Archives: brother

Unanswered questions Biological

Sometimes, when I’m sitting around feeling sorry for myself, I wonder why my biological parents didn’t want me.  The story my brother told me was that I was taken away from the home because of neglect. That’s all he had … Continue reading

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Toss up

I have so many thoughts in my head I don’t know which to talk about. Should I talk about my anxiety and feelings of never being good enough, never getting a good job again?  How long is my brain going … Continue reading

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ANXIOUS RANT

It’s been almost two months since I’ve written.  I’m off the Latuda because it made my blood sugar too high. So, I am trying something different.  My brain has been on pretty much of an even keel since I have … Continue reading

Posted in adult survivor of child abuse, anxiety, brother, Complex PTSD, depression and anxiety, Diabetes, weight, diet, healthy, kidneys, PTSD, sexual abuse, suicide, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Another Episode

Yes, I had another HUGE anxiety episode today. I didn’t bother to mention the big trigger I had Thursday.  I’ve started my new medication and it can’t start working fast enough. Basically it’s like three weeks without depression or anxiety … Continue reading

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No Meds

Boy, have I been a grumpy bitch for the past few weeks. Now I am totally weaned off my meds, tomorrow I should be able to start my new meds ($ permitting).  The good part is that I’m not extremely … Continue reading

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Managing Emotions

One of the things difficult for me, as a result of childhood sexual abuse, is my inability to handle my emotions.  I used to think that I dealt with my emotions well. Now I see that is not the case. … Continue reading

Posted in adult survivor of child abuse, anxiety, brother, child abuse, death, depression and anxiety, incest, PTSD, sexual abuse, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

I really fucking hate my life sometimes. 

I keep trying and trying. Try to be a good person, try to be kind.  Try to learn how to work with my depression and anxiety. Trying to learn how to change the way I feel and react to things. … Continue reading

Posted in adult survivor of child abuse, anxiety, brother, child abuse, Complex PTSD, death, depression and anxiety, incest, parent death, PTSD, sexual abuse, suicide, Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Whew!

That was a rough week. One of the shittiest I’ve had in months. I won’t say that it’s all over or I’m all better now, but I do feel a little better and have gained back some control of my … Continue reading

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Growing pains

Here I am again. I’m hoping that one day I will be writing when I feel good or when something good happens, not when I’m depressed or have had a bad day.  I believe I mentioned previously that I have … Continue reading

Posted in adult survivor of child abuse, anxiety, brother, child abuse, depression and anxiety, incest, love, parent death, PTSD, sexual abuse, suicide, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Kind Words

Yesterday I had individual therapy. Even though we talked about things I’d done in the past that still doesn’t make me feel very good about myself, I left feeling pretty decent. I wasn’t sad or depressed, or disgusted with myself. I do … Continue reading

Posted in adult survivor of child abuse, awareness, brother, child abuse, death, depression and anxiety, depression awareness, Diabetes, weight, diet, healthy, kidneys, incest, love, parent death, sexual abuse, suicide, suicide prevention, Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment